Category Archives: Life Issues/ Motivational Posts

Interview, Life Issues/ Motivational Posts

Talking About Regression Re-Birthing

This week I’m delving into the world of regression re-birthing, also known as the “recreation of the womb and birth experience”.  The object of regression re-birthing is to achieve a happy and healthy mind and body.  The subject sounded interesting to me and so I asked Nicolas Aujola, leading practioner and columnist for the Beverley Hill Times (yes, Hollywood!) what regression re-birthing entailed and its benefits…. as well as chatting about fashion, of course!  Welcome Nicolas….

Hi! I’m Nicolas Aujula – a London based Holistic Therapist, Life Coach, Intuitive and Designer with over 10 years of experience. I offer 1-2-1 sessions in person and via Skype, run workshops and have spoken in front of large audiences. My work has appeared internationally on ITV, Channel 4, Biography Channel, British newspapers and Hollywood magazines.

What inspired you to become a coach & therapist?

It all started when I was 17 years of age when I fell into a trance state that stimulated an out of body experience and flashbacks of my past-lives that literally changed my life. It was like an awakening where I instantly realised the power of the soul and the undying quality’s within us all that we carry forth beyond death. It helped me realised by own strengths and weaknesses, talents and personality traits, as well helping me resolve some of my teenage challenges of dealing with bullying, heartbreak and depression. I realised the power within me to change my past patterns to create the future I want. I left my A-level education to pursue my new found vocation and the rest is history. My main inspiration as a coach and therapist is to free clients from limitations, make them realise the power within and push them to be the best that they can. I love to see others blossom into their potential as there is so much each one us can do in our very unique ways. Empowerment is key that comes from making deep internal changes and developing personal tools for success that I’m proud to say my techniques ensure I share very short term yet intense relationship with clients that is focused on getting results. I’m privileged to have helped thousands of people from all walks of life from businessmen, politicians, celebrities to housewives learn to be more successful, self-confident, and happy, no matter what comes their way.

What attracted you to regression re-birthing? What are the main objectives of Regression Re-birthing?

Birth is a sacred and to be celebrated event. I believe happy births equal happy beings but actually how many of us have had happy births? I often found during my sessions that clients would regress back to their early womb experience where they spoke about absorbing beliefs, feelings and even traumas of their mothers and what was going on in the outside external world. I quickly understood that working through these imprints enabled great healing and freedom that re-birthing has become an important technique as part of our journey to self renewal. The ultimate goal of Regression Rebirthing is to regain true, high self-esteem in every area of your life. I feel Regression Rebirthing is an incredibly life changing process as clients relive their own births – discovering the tremendous impact being in the womb and birth had had on their own lives. Being a holistic process – it can also focus on our childhood and life experiences for healing and life change. It centres on breathing techniques and inner journeying that brings to your awareness unconscious thoughts, feelings and memories – some of which goes back to your birth – with the intention of accepting and integrating any ‘limiting emotions and thoughts’ in the cells of your body. This simple, yet powerful technique offers a natural way to manage stress and disengage behavioral patterns by putting trust in the healing power of our own breath. We can not have limitations and relaxation in the same space at the same time. Relaxation is the ultimate healer. Every breath induces relaxation. Therefore, breathing is the basic healer.

Could you describe a typical session?

Each session involves both inner journeying into the past and deep breathing process. The process rejuvenates the cells of your body and brings to awareness unconscious thoughts, memories and feelings. By accepting anything that occurs in a session and continuing with the breathing, you are able to dissolve the original ‘charge’ and integrate whatever is happening. This is what is called a deep release – a cellular cleansing of tension and stress in the body. You have the opportunity to clear limiting patterns that you’ve built up over years, for example the fear of not feeling good enough, low self-esteem, emotional pain, destructive patterns, the behaviours that you’ve built up over time. It’s like being a sponge and finally getting an opportunity to clear and release everything. You literally breathe underneath the pain, fear, trauma, and let it go. It allows you to make space for positive feelings of love, joy and happiness. Combining deep breathing with positive thoughts supports us and expands our joy and vitality to create lasting life change. Holding onto and suppressing negative, fearful thoughts creates tensions, unhappiness and disease. With the aid of visualisations and positive affirmations, given during the Regression Rebirthing, you will be able to create and attract exactly what you want in life. My philosophy stresses that “Thought is creative” that all our thoughts and beliefs create results in our life. If we change our thoughts, we change our lives because everything follows on from thought.

What are the benefits of Regression Re-birthing?

It enhaces our well-being by helping a variety of physical, emotional and psychological areas:
Traumatic Births;
Difficult Mother/Father Relationship
Asthma, IBS, Arthritis, Migraine, Insomnia, etc;
Low Confidence and Self-Esteem
Fears & Phobias
Body Image and Weight Problems
Depression, Anxiety, Panic Attacks etc;
Sexual Abuse and Related Patterns of Behaviour;
Psychosomatic Conditions;
Suppressed Emotions;
Limiting Relationship Patterns
Lack of Life Purpose;
Loneliness; Isolation, Social Anxiety
General Stuckness in Life

You also practice Street Regression – what does that entail?

Street Regression arose initially from the desire to challenge myself as a practitioner to see if it was possible to practise my craft on the streets amidst the noise and chaos of urban life. Despite a usual session being undertaken in a private, serene and peaceful environment, the streets of the city provided a particularly testing opportunity to prove the potential of regression therapy. Within 10-15 minutes, I have successfully been able to guide passers by through a unique insightful experience right in the middle of the street, many of whom were amazed and gob smacked by what they realised and experienced. We’ve all seen street hypnosis used for entertainment purposes but my aim is to provide a more insightful and therapeutic approach that can help people in their daily lives.
– VIDEO LINK – https://youtu.be/3Pc1EF8GBSw

You are a columnist for the Beverley Hill Times. What advice or articles were most popular?

My readers in Beverly Hills love my advice on dating, relationships and self-improvement, much of which is inspired by my knowledge of Astrology and how it can gives us perspective. It’s a real privilege to write for the Beverly Hills Times as it’s enabled me to meet many talented and inspirational people – the editor Suzanne Takowsky tells me the cast of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills are the biggest fans of my column.

You are a coach & therapist. Growing up though, did you inspire to go into the medical world or did you have other ambitions?

Growing up I had many ambitions from wanting to be a Writer, Psychologist, Historian, Astrologer, Fashion Designer and Film Director. In many way I’ve been able to incorporate many of those into my career. Whilst I’m not a conventional psychologist, I use alternative methods to empower people to deal with mind and emotion, overcome limitations and fulfil their potential. I’m written for numerous publications, practise Astrology, listen to historical accounts as people relay their past-lives, have designed dresses for clients and have created a short film exploring taboos. I firmly believe we should never limit ourselves to one chosen path in life but to be open to explore new avenues and develop personal talents as we are all multifaceted individuals.

Although you are based in the UK, are Regression Re-birthing sessions available overseas? How can a person register for sessions?

Yes,sessions are available to those abroad. Distance is not really a problem as I’m increasing using mobile technology like Skype which works just as well as face-to-face sessions. I have worked with international clients from USA, Canada, Australia, India, Spain, Brazil to UAE over the past few years. For sessions via Skype I can be emailed via my website.

When you’re not working, what hobbies/past times do you enjoy?

– Travel and Adventure: I love travel, especially city breaks as they are full of history, culture and great night life. My favourite city’s are Istanbul, Rome, Madrid and Lisbon. Adrenaline pumping activities that get you all worked up and excited are always invited from jet skiing, hot air balloons to paragliding.
– Yoga and meditation: I’ve been practising daily for the past 16 years. It’s the secret to a healthy mind, body and soul. My favourite poses are triangle and cobra into downward facing dog
– Cooking: I love to get in the kitchen and cook. Great food is simple, healthy, fresh and flavoursome. I adore Mexican, Indian and Thai cuisines with a love for dark chocolate, oaty treats and anything with ginger.
– Sewing: my artistic side is expressed through taking some material, cutting out patterns and get cracking on a sewing machine. It’s thrilling yet creative. I have so much respect for those machinists who make our clothes because I understand what is involved. Over the years for friends and clients I’ve put together some great style creations. Inspired by helping clients go through breakups I created the Divorce Dress which has featured in Daily Mail, Glamour and Huffington Post.
– Books: I love to immerse in books. Only the hard stuff that I can hold as I can’t do kindle or digital. Anything from spirituality, self-improvement, biographys to esoteric subjects take my fancy.

Personal now – what outfits and shoes would you normally be found wearing?

A pair of skinny jeans/trousers paired with a brightly coloured fitted top or shirt – I love vibrant colours such as orange, yellow, pinks and greens. I’m a firm believer in how colour can influence our mood and energy that we should pay more attention in how we use colour, it can only influence our daily lives. Am currently loving my one shouldered pair of dungarees. Shoes must be metallic – my current favourites are my Supra high tops which I have in gold, silver and rose gold. Finish the look complimented by a pair of Tom Ford aviators.

Do you have any favourite shops or online sites?

I love high street staple Zara for their stylish interpretations of catwalk trends. For online shopping ASOS.com and Zalando.com are firm favourites that offer great choices. It has to be Supra for my high top shoes. For designer fashion, I adore Aspinal for bags, Tom Ford and Prada for sunglasses and Versace for their bold pieces.

What’s next on your clothes/shoe wish list?

I know when I’ll see it as long as it’s form fitting, bright, funky or metallic. Currently on the hunt for a great tote manbag – any suggestions anyone?

Boots or Shoes?

Pointed boots with metal caps are definitely a sexy style statement. Be sure to add a layer of gel sole cushions so you can strut and paint the town yellow at all hours.

Links you would like to share e.g. website/facebook/twitter etc so that readers of the blog can learn more about Regression Re-birthing.

Website – www.inspired-artisan.com – www.knowyourpastlife.com
Facebook – www.facebook.com/nicolasaujula
Twitter – www.twitter.com/nicolasaujula

Thanks Nicolas for the insight into a fascinating subject and I love your flair for fashion too!  I’m quite interested in your love for metallic shoes … I have some silver gladiator heeled sandals and I have seen some bronze/rose gold sandals recently that I quite fancy this summer.  So, dear readers, what do you think about wearing metallic coloured footwear? Do share your thoughts…

Linda x

All photographs have been published with kind permission of Nicolas Aujula.

 

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An Interview With Rosemary Conley CBE

I’m really quite excited to welcome onto my blog tonight a lady who in the late 1980s made a big impression on me as a young twenty year old; in fact she still impresses me today.  I was then and still am attracted by her boundless energy, by her “can do” attitude, by her very smiley demeanour, by her lithe and petite figure.  Even today, at 8pm she tweets her daily challenge …sometimes easy, sometimes hard, always fun.  That lady is the gorgeous Rosemary Conley CBE…. who has had over 40 years experience of helping people lose weight and keep fit…. and I was so pleased that she agreed to chat with me about her online weight loss club, her life and  of course, we talked about fashion and shoes too…. hi Rosemary…..

Hi, I am Rosemary Conley CBE and I am a diet and fitness expert living in Leicestershire, England. I have been in the business of helping people to lose weight and become fitter for 45 years, and I have written 37 books and presented 30 fitness DVDs of which their combined sales total almost 10 million.

What inspired you to launch the Rosemary Conley online Weight-Loss Club?

Rosemary Conley Online is a digital weight-loss club which launched some 15 years ago. It has been an exciting enterprise as we have been part of the online revolution as it has grown and developed. We have a new and exciting website which enables our members to enjoy over 2000 videos of how-to-cook recipes, exercises, motivation, a food & fitness diary and advice from nationally recognised top experts as well as real-life coaches. We also offer a personal One-2-One coaching service.

Your weight-loss club offers, as well as real life coaching, a variety of eating plans. Why do you offer a range of 6 different plans? Which “plan” seems to be the most popular amongst your members?

Selecting the best eating plan to help you lose weight is very much down to the individual. We offer plans from my new 3-2-1 Diet which is based on ‘light’ and ‘normal’ days of eating along the lines of the 5:2 diet but more generous, or there are my ‘classic’ diets from which to choose which are calorie based for those who want more structure, and then we have our new Complete Lifestyle Change Plan which is a 12 week programme of information and inspiration to help member to make permanent changes to their lives. No one diet is more popular than another. It is all down to personal preference.

What diet plan do you personally stick to?

I stick to a low fat, low Gi, eating pattern without any calorie counting or dieting. I avoid high-fat treats such as crisps, chocolate, biscuits and cake because, whilst I love them, I know they will make me gain weight. It all comes down to the fact that I like being slim more than I want the treats! I spent too many years being overweight and hating myself for being so to run the risk of going back there. I used to weigh 2½st more than I do now. I like being a size 8 (UK) and I weigh 8 stone (112lb/51kg) which is ideal for my 5’2” height. I stay physically fit by still teaching a couple of aerobics classes each week, walking the dogs at weekends, going to a special gym with a physiotherapist for an hour a week and ice skating when I can – probably every two or three weeks.

I believe that keeping healthy not only relies on food intake, but also moving about/exercising. I try to do yoga and Pilates; and I do enjoy the odd aerobic session too. I monitor my steps on a Fitbit ….What forms of exercise do you personally enjoy? What forms of exercise seems to appeal to your weight loss club members?

I think it is important for us to find a form of exercise we enjoy so that we keep doing it. I hate swimming or running but I love exercising to music and walking in the countryside but I am limited by my arthritic feet which has come upon me in the last year. I am 70 now and it seems as though my body has suddenly realised my age! That’s why I go to the physio gym as my physiotherapist is aware of my limitations but still pushes me hard so I stay fit in the rest of my body. I want to live a long and healthy life – even if my feet hurt! Rosemary Conley Online members are offered all kinds of exercise on our site from Pilates to Salsa, chair workouts and aerobics or toning. There really is something for everyone, even new mums.

Although you live in the UK, is your online weight loss club available to access overseas?

Our online club is available to anyone across the world except for the USA or Canada. We have lots of overseas members and I love the fact that with an online weight-loss club you can access it anywhere, anytime, 24/7.

Are you looking at writing other books in the future? What topics would you like to cover?

I think my 3-2-1 Diet is probably my last diet book but I am beginning to work on my autobiography. In 2018 my Hip & Thigh Diet will be 30 years old. I think it would be great to have my life-story published in that year.

The Rosemary Conley Online Weight Loss Club is one of the UK’s leading online weight loss clubs.How can people sign up to be a member? Are there any restrictions? What are the main benefits to joining your club?

Anyone can join Rosemary Conley Online providing they have weight to lose, are over 18 and are not pregnant. Everyone is asked to complete a health questionnaire which is personally checked. Once signed up, all a member needs is internet access. It really is very simple. With basic computer skills anyone can navigate our site. We have monthly, quarterly and annual memberships available as well as a premium One-2-One personal coaching service which members can opt-in and opt-out of. Our results are amazing and my favourite part of my job is meeting members who are invited to our photoshoots. To see these amazing successful slimmers looking toned and gorgeous is just heart-warming. It’s why I, and the rest of our Rosemary Conley team, love our job.

You have over 2500 healthy recipes online – have you got any particular favourites?

We continue to add to our online recipes and one of our team is a supreme cook who has a real talent for creating recipes so there’s always something new appearing on the site. I can’t say I have a particular favourite. I love them all.

There are general concerns about the growing global obesity epidemic. What do you feel are the reasons behind this epidemic?

I think the main reason for the obesity epidemic is lifestyle change. The advent of the internet, internet shopping and mobile phones all mean that we can run our lives without moving around as much as we used to. I really don’t know where it will end unless people take responsibility for their own health and wellbeing. We have to eat less and move more!

When you’re not working, what hobbies/past times do you enjoy?

I have a lovely life because I enjoy my work and I enjoy writing. I love spending time with my family as well as ice skating and walking our dogs around our beautiful garden.

Personal now- what outfits and shoes would you normally be found wearing?

I love clothes – a lot! – and I have spent the last 50 years wearing stilettos and am now having to come to terms with the fact that I can only wear flat and kitten heel styles due to my arthritic feet! I am a pear shape which means I have a decent waist so I like to wear fitted styles and ice skating is fantastic for shaping up your butt so I am happy wearing jeans and trousers too.

Do you have any favourite shops/online sites?

I buy most of my clothes from the Madeleine catalogue, as they fit me so well and the quality of the fabrics and workmanship is second to none. They seem to be ahead of the game as far as fashion and style is concerned and I just love their clothes as well as their shoes which are fabulous and great quality. I enjoy having them delivered to home so that I can try the clothes at home in my own time and with my own accessories. If I don’t like something, I just send it back free of charge. It really works for me.

What’s next on your clothes/shoes wish list?

I love the Spring as my colouring is Spring/Summer so I will be ordering some lovely bright shades of dresses and tops for this year.

Boots or Shoes?

I wear boots more now than I ever used to and they are always flat. I started wearing flat ones five years ago when I was on ITV’s Dancing on Ice. As a high-heel devotee for so many decades I needed to train my heels to be happy nearer the ground as when you skate that’s essential! I have grown to really like wearing stylish military-looking knee-high boots which seem to work well with fitted leggings and a long jacket/coat.

Links you wish to share:

Go to www.rosemaryconley.com to find out more about Rosemary Conley Online. I am personally on Twitter at @rosemaryconley and I do a daily fitness challenge at 8pm (UK time) each evening. You can find us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/RosemaryConleyOnline.

It has been a real honour to have you on the blog, Rosemary – thank you so much for taking part. I do love that you like bright shades for tops – for me, bright shades make me feel happy! Dear readers, do you have certain shades that you feel happy?  Do shades of yellow make you smile? Does red make you feel daring?  Do tell, I’d love to know!

Linda x

All photographs have been published with kind permission of Rosemary Conley CBE

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Slim Mind

Keeping healthy and maintaining a healthy weight is not an easy feat, but it is not impossible to do  –  I believe you really just need to be in the right frame of mind, otherwise your attempts to exercise and/or eat the right foods will just fritter away.  I was really pleased to come across a book called “Slim Mind” which helped to reinforce my “mind over matter” belief as its aims are to develop the reader’s long term skills & motivation to think, act and stay slim; therefore liberating you from weighing scales, low fat foods and yo yo dieting.  The author, health psychologist Dr Catherine Sykes, has spent a long time researching health behaviour change and I was lucky enough to interview Catherine about her work and her book.  Hi Catherine…

Hi! I’m Dr Catherine Sykes, a psychologist who develops mindsets that promote life-long success, health and happiness. I do this through therapy, coaching and consultancy. I’m a working mother of 2 children.

Congratulations on publishing your book, “Slim Mind”. What inspired you to put pen to paper?

I’ve worked with lots of people who want to lose weight and one thing that struck me was that people wanted quick and easy methods to lose weight and had tried so many methods in the process. These methods were always contrary to what the evidence in psychological research found was needed. Firstly, weight lost is not quick and easy and the overuse of willpower does not work, in fact it backfires, keeping people in a pattern of yo-yo dieting pattern and self blame. I wanted to bring the psychological evidence to a wider audience and to simplify the techniques as much as possible so that people could try them in a self-help format.

The book is a series of psychological techniques, including cognitive behaviour therapy, to help you understand your eating behaviours, helps you to develop long term skills and motivation to think, act and stay slim. Written from your own private practice experiences and scientific world discoveries – what is the main objectives of the book?

The main objective is to inform people that weight loss is not quick and easy. It takes a long-term sustained approach. This book aims to empower people to take control of their weight loss journey without self-blame and with realistic expectations of what is needed to lose weight.

One bit of advice I gained from the book is “Eat when you are hungry, not when you have a craving”. If you have to pass on one piece of wisdom or advice to a person, what would be that pearl of wisdom?

Restricting certain foods with willpower does not work. Evidence suggests that if we suppress thoughts about certain things then we are more likely to think about it. So if you tell yourself not to think about the chocolate cake in the fridge, you are actually increasing the likelihood that you will think about it and eventually reach for it.

Although you live in the UK, is your book available to purchase overseas?

Yes, it can be purchased on Amazon.com

Are you looking at writing other books in the future? What topics would you like to cover?

Slim Mind is the first book in the Zenitude Coaching series which aims to bring easy to follow solutions to promote life long success, happiness and health. Other books to come:
The Juggling Act. Returning to Work Following Maternity Leave.
Zestful Ageing.
Confidence at Work
Positive to Return to Work Following and Illness

What sort of book genre do you like reading? Favourite books or authors?

I love reading lots of genres including mystery and espionage, history and bibliography, suspense, travel. I can always read an Ian McEwan book.

You are a health psychologist. Growing up though, did you inspire to go into the medical world or did you have other ambitions?

I had other ambitions. I’ve always been increased in jobs that relate to promoting a better society. When I was young, my mum’s friend was studying sociology. I picked up one of her books and could not put it down. Although, I did not know exactly what it was but back then, I wanted to be a sociologist.

You are particularly concerned about the global growing obesity epidemic. What do you feel are the reasons behind this epidemic?

Availability of unhealthy foods.
Sedentary lifestyles.
Emotional eating and inability to understand and name one’s emotions.

When you’re not working, what hobbies/past times do you enjoy?

Cooking and eating with friends, reading, country walks.

Personal now – what outfits and shoes would you normally be found wearing?

For work, I tend to go for comfortable elegant clothes. At the weekends, I can be found in Sweaty Betty gear.

Do you have any favourite shops or online sites?

I do love clothes from Joseph. I love the fabrics and style. I also like Reiss.

What’s next on your clothes/shoe wish list?

I’m looking for an elegant winter dress.

Boots or Shoes?

Both – depends what I’m wearing. Currently I seem to be wearing my Russell and Bromley black suede ankle boots with everything.

Links you would like to share e.g. website/facebook/twitter etc so that readers of the blog can learn more about you and your book.

twitter – drcsykes1
Facebook:
https://m.facebook.com/drslimmind (on mobile device)
https://facebook.com/drslimmind (on pc)

Lovely to talk to you Catherine and I personally found your book very inspirational.  Funnily enough, I studied sociology at school and at college – I loved the subject as well!  Well, dear readers, do you have a slim mind?  How do you get into a healthy mindset?  Do share your thoughts, I’d love to know,

Linda x

All photographs have been  published with kind permission of Dr Catherine Sykes.

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The Mystery Of You

Revealing the mystery of you – my guest this week is engineer, entrepreneur, personal trainer and author, John Ferris, who has just written a potentially life-changing book “The Yo(u)niverse Paradox: Revealing The Mystery Of You”.  Written from John’s own life and discoveries, plus merging spirituality and science; John attempts to guide the reader to reveal their uniqueness and to start building the life of their dreams.   John also has a passion for personal training and sport, even using his engineering capabilities to design and manufacture his own home gym equipment.  I caught up with John recently to find out more …. Hi John …

Hi, my name is John and I was born in Belfast, Northern Ireland at the beginning of the troubles. My initial experiences were groomed on a Belfast estate later moving to the suburbs. I left school with little qualifications, but under my mother’s influence I attended college and then university, graduating in mechanical engineering. I initially worked in the aerospace industry, but from the outset I knew for me, fulfilment would always be out of reach; being such a small cog in a big wheel. In conjunction with my full-time job, I set up a small part-time business manufacturing my own unique exercise equipment. Alas it transpired I was probably a decade too early, at least here in the U.K. Either that or my ideas were rubbish! In saying that it acted as a stepping stone, turning my hobby as a fitness enthusiast into my current profession as a Personal Trainer. I opened Northern Ireland’s first personal training studio and was very content with my life through my fortieth year.

Congratulations on publishing your book, “The Yo(u)niverse Paradox: Revealing The Mystery Of You”. What was the catalyst that in effect changed your life?

Thank you. Just prior to my forty-first birthday my mother passed away. Terrible times most of us have to endure, but inevitable in the general sequence of events. What happened next brought me face to face with my worst nightmare. Three weeks after my mother’s passing on my 41st birthday, my wife and I were informed our six-year-old daughter Robyn had an incurable brain tumour (from western medical point of view). That moment changed everything. It was the catalyst for my spiritual awakening. The beginning of seeing the world through new eyes. The gradual removing of the veils that hide the truth. Everything I thought I knew about the world was turned upside down, back to front and inside out.

The book promotes a model of reality using the fundamental principle of nature overlooked by the mainstream view which merges science and spirituality into an all-inclusive model -allowing for everything, omitting nothing. Written from your own life experiences and discoveries – What inspired you to put pen to paper?

A catalyst is easily definable. Inspiration on the other hand can quite often come from numerous experiences. I guess after seven years of reading, researching and most importantly meditating on the question of “when you die is that it or is there anything I can do to in my lifetime to change the past and experience my daughter growing up?” I amassed an incredible amount of information and felt the urge to put pen to paper to create some space in my mind. As I was writing I could see a repeatable pattern that combined the inner self with the outer experience of the world. I applied the latest scientific discoveries with the esoteric wisdom (spirituality) hidden within every religion to show a pattern that connects everything. This pattern is the key to reality. At times I was blown away by the clarity that was evolving. I was writing off the cuff and didn’t follow any writing protocols or techniques especially since I had never written a book before, but to my surprise it all seemed to fall into place. I realised so much throughout the process. It is a very liberating experience!

If you have to pass on one piece of wisdom or advice to a person, what would be that pearl of wisdom?

You are not an insignificant being living on an insignificant speck in an infinite universe. You are imbued with the most powerful gift of the universe – the power of choice! Use it wisely by letting go of being the victim and take full responsibility.

Although you live in the UK, is your book available to purchase overseas?

Yes,  my book is published by Balboa press based in the States so can be purchased through their or my website (revealthemystery.com) and also around the world on Amazon.com.

Are you looking at writing other books in the future? What topics would you like to cover?

Yes,  I would imagine myself writing some more. Probably similar in nature, but also might link into the health and fitness industry from a functional everyday perspective.

What sort of book genre do you like reading? Favourite books or authors?

I don’t think it will come as any surprise that’s its books based on ‘What is reality?’  Conversations with God book 1 by Neale Donald Walsh was a mind blower. Various books by Deepak Chopra, Gregg Braden and Bruce Lipton on the relationship of science and spirituality. Fred Alan Wolf’s Mind into Matter and The Yoga Of Time Travel are very good and of course The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. In the distant past I would have mainly read sporting autobiographies.

You are an engineer and entrepreneur by trade – you have designed and manufactured home gym equipment. Growing up though, did you inspire to go into the engineering field or did you have other ambitions?

Not at all. I ended up in the engineering sector purely as a result of the U.K. educational system and like most teenagers feeling somewhat lost on where my future lay. I, like a lot of kids, liked the idea of being a fireman until I remembered I had a fear of heights. When I was 17 and learning to drive, on one of the few occasions my mother braved a lesson, I do remember she asked me what my ambitions were for making a living. I told her one day I’d like to own a gym. Months earlier I had purchased a home gym barbell set which initially ignited my passion. Ironically the advice I recently gave my son was to ‘find his passion and put it into action’ because you are a long time working.

You are currently involved in an unique global soccer initiative called Circular Soccer. Could you explain a bit about that project?

About 4 years ago a retired client (the father of Mr. Grey himself – Jamie Dornan) told me of the idea he first had 50 years previous, when he was a teenage boy, playing one versus one football around a central goal (hence circular) which removed the need for a goalkeeper. As young kids few want to play as the goalkeeper. He asked me to go away and develop it. I came back with the idea of a pop up three-sided triangular net which we named the tri-goal, a no play zone and cones for restarting game. Rules were drawn up and after years of prototypes and a number of FIFA trials conducted in Japan, Barbados and at the FIFA headquarters in Switzerland we finally got to market. There are five core members of the team who have worked extremely hard to get this far and time will tell how successful Circular Soccer will become. The game itself has expanded and can cater for up to 10 players and is being used at numerous football clubs to develop players skill set, but can also be purchased for kids to play in the street, back garden or park. Our website is circularsoccer.com.

When you’re not working, what hobbies/past times do you enjoy?

I still play football most Sundays and still get the same thrill scoring a goal as I did when I was a kid. We men never grow up! I love the Marvel movies which bring me back to my childhood reading the comics. I also enjoy eating out in nice restaurants and occasionally have been known to partake in the Belfast pub culture. My body is a temple, but only for part of the week and there are those who would say my body reflects that! I firmly believe life is about balance. Did I mention coffee shops?

Personal now – what outfits and shoes would you normally be found wearing?

My daywear reflects my job so no interest there. I love Ant and Dec bomber style jackets. I call them that as during each year watching the television programme – “I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here” – I drive my wife crazy pointing out all the bomber jackets that look cool. My “go to” look I guess would be a nice crisp white shirt with black or denim jeans transported on a Ted Baker brogue.

Do you have any favourite shops or online sites?

Not particularly, but thinking about it I do seem to have accumulated a fair amount of Ted Baker/Guess labels and the odd Primark.

What’s next on your clothes/shoe wish list?

A new white shirt……seriously!

Boots or Shoes?

Back in the day it was definitely boots. They ranged from Dr Martens to Chelsea boots with the Cowboy boots or ‘Cowbs’ as they affectionately became known somewhere in the mix. I still have them in the hope that one day they will come back into fashion. My wife has just informed me they never were in fashion!

Links you would like to share e.g. website/facebook/twitter etc so that readers of the blog can learn more about you and your book.

My book webpage is revealthemystery.com
On Facebook my book page is also revealthemystery
Also check out circularsoccer.com

Great chatting to you John – it has been a pleasure to have you on the blog.  Your book is  certainly interesting and you’re truly an inspiration.  I love the advice you gave your son: find your passion, put it into action.  That’s the kind of advice I offer my children too. Dear readers, what was the best advice you’ve received?  What advice have you given to your offspring? As always, do share  – I’d love to know your thoughts…

Linda x

Photos published with kind permission of John Ferris.

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Revisiting Buckso Dhillon Woolley

Way back, almost exactly 2 years ago, on 7 November 2014, I interviewed actress/singer Buckso Dhillon Woolley (read original interview HERE) who had just starred in a UK countrywide advert for frozen food company, Iceland, alongside heart throb Peter Andre.  Buckso was looking forward to auditioning for a part in the West End stage show, Bend It Like Beckham.  So now, two years on, did Buckso  get a role in Bend It Like Beckham?  Is she still singing? I caught up with Buckso recently to find the answers to those questions and more…. Welcome back onto the blog Buckso!

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Hi there! I’m Buckso DHILLON-WOOLLEY and I’m an actor/speaker just finalising my 1st eBook on RESILIENCE as I make a segway into the speaking arena!

I was fortunate enough to interview you in November 2014 …. so, what made you want to become an actress in the first place?

Yes you did! And my what a journey these last few months have been! I’d say the very first time I knew the entertainment industry was the only way for me, was after I’d discovered I had a voice singing the theme tune to Why Don’t You back when I was a young teen. After that, I as bitten by the bug!

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Congratulations on your appearance in the West End production of “Bend It Like Beckham” as Auntiji ( Aunty G) for the 2015 run! Being picked for a West End show is such an achievement in itself… and a role you was hoping to get when I last interviewed you too! What was it like being in such a fabulous West End production? Any memorable moments that stand out?

Yes, it was something I finally nailed after auditioning for it 3yrs on the trot, and it was such a relief to get a yes! The thrill of a live audience was fantastic as I’d never experienced theatre before so wasn’t sure what to expect, which was good in some ways as I was going in with no expectations and I have to say it was phenomenal to be in such a well received show..with 5 star ratings and brilliant reviews I was a tad spoilt you might say! Most memorable moment would be the press night party..seeing something like that in such a scale was lovely and the fact my sister and husband had the chance to share it with me made it even more special considering I’d been mugged at gunpoint the night before. Maybe that’s the most memorable part actually!

As you revealed in 2014, you have a love for films … So I was dead chuffed to hear that you’ve been filming a new feature film written & directed by Andrew Hulme called “The Devil Outside”. Can you reveal what the film is about and the part that you play?

Oh yes I’m a big fan of films and SO pleased my first one was based and filmed in and around an area I live near. In short, I play the mum to the young lad and it’s a sort of coming of age film, set in Nottingham about religion, madness and repressed sexuality, and that’s all I can say! You have a lot to look forward to as Andrew Hulme has a great eye for shots and capturing a story with ability for fine detail.

In 2014, you met THE man himself, Peter Andre, whilst filming the Iceland advert. So as you’ve forayed since then into the world of theatre and movies, who have you encountered that have made a lasting impression on you?

You know I’ve yet to meet someone who has had a lasting impression on me as I’m really not that in awe of anyone as such. It’s more about how a person makes me feel by what they say after they’ve gone. If I’m still pondering what they’ve said more than 24hrs later then I know they’ve left their mark.

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In 2014, you hoped to release an album or set of songs based on the Bond films… depending on whether you got the “Bend It Like Beckham” role or not! As we all know, you did get the role – but did you manage to do a Bond set or is it still on the back burner? Do you still get to do any singing?

Ah I’m still waiting to do that! It’s on the back burner right now but most definitely something I want to do in my life. I’ve sang at a couple of charity dos this October but there was a point after the show finished where I thought I’d never sing again as my voice totally decided to leave me for a few months! At that point I realised just how important it is for me to sing, whether it’s paid or not, as it feeds my soul.

Looking ahead to 2017 – any plans in the pipeline that you can reveal to us?

Well one thing I can definitely say is happening will be the release of my new ebook which should be out at the end of November. I’m booking now for talks and speaking gigs for networking groups and schools so should be rolling that out next year alongside my acting etc. The book itself is called “The Resilience Queen: 7.5 Steps to finding your own”. It gives motivation and guidance to finding and maintaining your resilience in times of adversity and uncertainty. This is with a view to following it up with another book that talks more in depth about each chapter with examples of times in my life I’ve had to be resilient and continue to overcome any and all obstacles! Also recently started to work with a fantastic new skincare and cosmetics company, MAELLE, which launched in October and you can visit my website below for more info or email me direct.

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Personal now – what outfits and shoes would you normally be found wearing?

Weellll,  I’m a die-hard Primark fan but even I’ve noticed lately I’m choosing more of the Marks and Spencer gear – it’s actually quite appealing to me and I’m shocked! I guess my taste is becoming more refined as I age but I’ve always maintained I’d never do designer stuff and I stand by that still. I’m not knocking those who do, I just choose to spend my dollar elsewhere. Shoes wise,  I’m again going for the comfy foot glove range from Marks & Spencer. More so because, since April this year, I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis which thankfully is under control now, but if my feet are squished in a shoe, they ain’t happy!

Do you have any favourite designers?

Not as such but when I buy from QVC (yep still a big fan!) I do love Dennis Basso for coats and Nina Leonard, Attitudes by Renee, Anything Design, Chelsea Muse and BIBA for clothes, as they’re so unique!

What’s next on your clothes/shoe wish list?

I’m now on a bit of a mission to get some gorge autumn/winter boots that are faux fur lined, like the EMU boots range that come in a host of fabulous colours.

Boots or Shoes?

Boots win hands down!

Links you would like to share e.g. website/facebook/twitter etc so that readers can learn more you & follow your career.

Instagram : @buckso_
Twitter : @bucksodw
Facebook : https://m.facebook.com/bucksodw
www.myelle.co.uk
www.resiliencequeen.com

It has been fantastic to catch up with you, Buckso, and am so glad you have so many things in the pipeline and plenty for us to look forward to! Glad your auditioning perseverance on stage with Bend It Like Beckham paid off, although being mugged at gunpoint is not an experience I would like to have! So, dear readers,  Buckso has admitted that her shopping preferences have changed as she’s got older – finding herself being attracted to M & S whereas previously Primark was her main go to shop –  have you found yourself drifting away from your favourite shop as you’ve got older? Drop me a comment… I’d love to know…

Linda x

All photographs published with kind permission from Buckso Dhillon-Woolley.

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A Hug In A Box

Every now and then we all appreciate a hug – a hug to lift our mood and alleviate stress.  Sometimes a person is around to give that said hug  but if nobody is around when life is stressing you out, occasionally a virtual hug will have to suffice.  That’s when a BuddyBox can step in – it’s a virtual hug in a box – created for ANYONE who could benefit from a boost.  Love to know more?  Well, I wanted to know more so I caught up with Jayne Hardy, founder of Blurt to discover all…. Hi Jayne…

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Hi, I’m Jayne Hardy, Blurt’s Founder. I lost most of my twenties to
depression. At the height of my illness I was unable to work, leave the house or even undertake the most basic acts of self-care. When I founded Blurt in 2011, my chief goal was to prevent others from feeling as isolated as I had done. Having experienced first-hand the powerful connections that could be fostered via social media, I deliberately focused Blurt’s activities online – providing interim support for those struggling with depression and challenging the stigma around mental health. I’m also a Mum to two-year-old Peggy and live in Cornwall.

What inspired you to launch the BuddyBox?

We applied for some grant funding from UnLtd to develop our online shop, as we’ve always wanted to be sustainable long-term. In the initial meeting, our grant manager, Julie, was speaking to us about her daughter’s struggle with mental ill health whilst at university and how Julie would love for there to be some sort of ‘wellbeing’ box that she could send. The idea struck a cord and BuddyBox was born.

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BuddyBox is run by your organisation, Blurt. Can you explain a bit about Blurt and the work that you do?

We’re dedicated to helping those affected by depression. We’ll help you understand depression and what it means for you. We’ll support you, listen to you and introduce you to people who’ve been where you are. We’ll help you break down barriers and broach the subject with those closest to you. We’ll help you help yourself, with a little knowing nod. We think people who’ve experienced it know best, so we’re passionate about peer support – connecting those who have been through depression with those who are currently struggling, to provide reassurance and comfort during a very scary time.

I love your idea of these boxes – packed full of thoughtful, mood lifting treats – “A hug in a box” indeed. I know that the range of products for filling the boxes are a closely guarded secret, but what sort of items do you include?

We aim to provide a ‘self-care’ experience for the recipient and so we include products to nourish, comfort and inspire.

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What subscriptions are available? Are you able to purchase a box as a “one off”?

We have several options available – a monthly subscription, quarterly subscription, 6-monthly subscription and an annual subscription. And of course, the one-off boxes.

Where do you get your ideas from when sourcing and looking for products to fill the boxes? Do you get customers suggesting particular products?

We come up with a box theme in the first instance and then we look for products which fit within that theme but also work together to provide an experience for someone. We’re still relatively new and so we’ve been trying new things and seeking feedback to help us grow and improve.

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Any plans to expand your range of boxes in the future?

We’ve got ideas aplenty but it’s knowing whether they’re good ideas and also whether there’s a need for them. We’re taking our time and working with focus groups before we commit to anything.

As you are based in the UK, are your boxes available to purchase overseas?

Yes, they are indeed! We’ve recently opening up international shipping which was an exciting change and so we now ship worldwide.

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Apart from receiving a BuddyBox, of course, what do you personally do or use that helps you to de-stress/ feel pampered?

I’m an introvert so I’m most recharged when I’ve spent some time on my own – reading a book, having a bath or watching a series of something on Netflix. I also enjoy running and spending time with my family, my daughter is 2 years old and I’m loving seeing the world through her eyes – finding the joy and excitement in simplicity.

Personal now – what outfits and shoes would you normally be found wearing?

I’m pretty much always in a pinafore dress, dungarees and jeans. And on my feet? Flip flops.

Do you have any favourite shops or online sites? (Apart from your own)

I’m a bit of a lazy and unimaginative shopper when it comes to clothes and so I like ASOS because I can find everything all in one place. I also love Preta Portabello and LUSH.

What’s next on your clothes/shoe wish list?

I need some winter boots.

Boots or Shoes?

I don’t really like having anything on my feet which is why I love flip flops but during the winter, I can’t bear feeling cold so I love boots to keep my feet warm – with thick snuggly socks.

Links you would like to share e.g. website/facebook/twitter etc so that readers can find out more about BuddyBox and Blurt.

Website: https://www.blurtitout.org

BuddyBox: https://www.blurtitout.org/BuddyBox

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/blurtitout

Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/blurtalerts

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theblurtfoundation

A fantastic idea Jayne and thank you so much for introducing your boxes on the blog!  Opening a box of goodies would cheer me up no end … whatever it contained… Skincare, bubble bath, make up, hosiery, lingerie, chocolates, prosecco, books, perfume,  teabags … dear readers, would you appreciate a hug in a box? If you opened a surprise package, what would be inside to put a smile on your face?

Linda x

All photos have been published with kind permission of The Blurt Foundation.

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Hidden Mind

I came across an interesting book recently talking about the connection between the sub conscious and the mind/body, known as “bio energy”. It was called Hidden Mind: A Journey of Reconnection by Tom Griffin and Dr Nuala Bent.  Bio-energy therapy treatment is used in the special needs area of health, such as dyslexia, ADHD, ADD and Autistic Spectrum Disorder; and in some cases, for depression and anxiety too.  Tom Griffin developed the Hidden Mind/Bio- Energy and Corrective Sound Programme  – which is included in its entirety in the book; and Dr Nuala Bent is a Senior Research Fellow (Rehab Medicine) at the University of Leeds, a Plexus Bio Energy Therapist, Registered Reflexologist & Reiki Master.  I was lucky enough to catch up with Dr Nuala Bent to find out more ….and we talked about clothes too…. Hi Nuala!

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Hello. My name is Nuala and my passion is to inform people about the body’s natural ability to heal itself given the right circumstances and environment. I am originally from Ireland but have lived in Lancashire, UK for the past thirty years. My background was in Academia where most of my work was research based.

Congratulations on publishing your book, “Hidden Mind: A Journey of Reconnection” – a powerful collaboration between yourself and Tom Griffin – a book that invites readers to re-ignite their mind/body connection and thrive. What inspired you to put pen to paper?

I have always been a people person and realised a long time ago that we are not islands in our ability to communicate with one another. While maintaining our uniqueness we all have an integral part to play which impacts on the whole of humanity. Working on long term research projects gave me an insight into people’s lives which went way beyond the masks we all tend to wear in the public arena. I became aware of the possibility of a connection between health state, lifestyle and the outer and immediate personal environments. I also became aware of the importance of personal responsibility in a world which seemed to be dominated by pockets of control. This of course is down to conditioning and the set-up of the institutions which we encounter in our daily living. I realised that there was a need to remind people that they have an innate knowledge which needs to be accessed which is a powerhouse of information as to what the body needs to maintain optimal health. The meaning of the word ’education’ is ‘to lead out’. This implies that knowledge is already present to be accessed.

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The book includes the entire programme, as well as its foundation, of the Hidden Mind/Bio-Energy and Corrective Sound Programme as developed by Tom Griffin. As a qualified Bio-Energy therapist yourself, in what circumstances would you recommend bio-energy therapy?

Bio-energy is a rebalancing of the body’s own energy system by removing blockages which contribute to illness. It can be used in all circumstances, from the very young to the very old. It is about looking beyond the symptoms to try and establish the cause of the problems. Within our clinics, the primary aim of the therapist is to rebalance the energy system which in turn will unlock the natural healing process within the patient’s body. Only when the energy has been balanced can the body begin the process of returning to full health. Treatment is carried out over four consecutive days for approximately an hour a day. On the fourth day of treatment the therapist will go through an educational programme explaining any changes that need to be made regarding visualisation, diet, exercise, rest etc. This is an essential part of the programme and together with the balancing of the energy the correct environment is being created which will allow the body return to better health. The aim is to engage clients in a process that gives them an element of control over their own health. These treatments are the first steps on the journey to better health and patients must be willing to give the therapy time to work

What attracted you to start studying and practising complementary and natural healthcare?

A natural curiosity as to how I might help people to cope with life’s traumas and where possible to help people to look beyond life’s knocks and realise their own potential. I was also influenced by the many eminent people I met who had stood out against the established opinion and practically sacrificed career opportunities in order to tell the truth. I refer in particular to the late Professor Jan deVries whose commitment to the people in his care was awe inspiring. However, the final steps towards bio- energy training came as a result of ill health and surgery for a brain tumour after which I was much depleted of my usual zest for life and a friend suggested I go to Ireland for bio-energy treatment. I had not heard of it previously but after treatment over four consecutive days I was so impressed with how I felt that I began to enquire and read up more about all aspects of energy medicine. However, I did return on two other occasions for bio-energy over a period of several months after which I decided to train in the Plexus system. It was during this time that I met Tom Griffin, Co-founder of the Plexus system with Michael O’Doherty and current founder of the HiddenMind and Corrective sound and Bio-energy training Programme.Tom’s work inspired me towards the many discussions related to my passion to raise awareness for a new model of medicine which resulted in Tom giving me the opportunity to begin by writing our book so that the message would get out to the wider world.

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Although you live in the UK, is your book available to purchase overseas?

The book is available in Ireland through Tom’s website and people in the UK can contact myself. It is available on Amazon (kindle edition only) and it has also been recently translated into German because of the interest from Tom’s clinics in Germany.It is currently being translated into Polish. Tom runs clinics in Ireland, Canada, Germany, Poland, and recently in South Africa.

Are you looking at writing other books in the future? What topics would you like to cover?

I did a lot of research for our current book and therefore realised what a fount of knowledge I have gathered for this work. I have a big interest in the symptoms of heavy metal toxicity in the body which is an area of medicine which is virtually unknown and is seldom looked at as the possible basis of unexplained symptoms. There is also the complication that blood tests will only show toxicity if it is present and happening on the day of the test, but it remains in the tissues and takes a long time to remove. I also have a huge interest in ‘bodymind’ medicine and the new science of Epigenetics.

What sort of book genre do you like reading? Favourite books or authors?

In contrast to my work and my associated reading I like to have a novel on the go. I don’t like to travel without a book in my luggage. In particular authors who seem to have an insight into human relationships. I have a few favourites. Not surprisingly they include the late Maeve Binchy, Santa Montifiore, Kathy Kelly, Lesley Pearse, Barbara Kingsolver and others of a similar ilk.

You have worked many years as Panel Manager of a longitudinal study researching into cognitive ageing at the University of Manchester; and later as Senior Research Fellow (Rehab Medicine) at the University of Leeds. You are also a Plexus Bio Energy Therapist, Registered Reflexologist and Reiki Master. Growing up though, did you inspire to go into the medical/research field or did you have other ambitions?

Growing up I had many ambitions all of which presented themselves in accordance with what was the dominant theme of the time. However I was very lucky to find myself in a small boarding school in Southern Ireland with the Killeshandra Sisters who were an order of nuns who worked abroad on many of the world’s mission fields. I got to know many of these amazing woman who worked in situations which demanded courage and commitment to help people less fortunate. The friendships built up over the years in ‘CastleShanahan’ as the school was called were very important to me and gave me a confidence which supported me throughout my life’s journey. I still have contact with some of them to this day. I realised early on in my academic learning that I was drawn to research which probably fitted in with my curiosity about people and the life situations which impinged on them.

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Your passion is to raise awareness of the need for an integrated model of healthcare. What specific areas of healthcare do you feel is most in need of this integrated model? What hurdles are you coming across to prevent that happening?

Mostly related to the status quo opinion that health is an area that needs to be managed by a body of Professionals and that the ‘ordinary’ person has no control over how health manifests for them. A person needs to be central to the working out of the best possible way to deal with illness/disease. People need to be reminded or informed that there is a capacity for healing within each of us that needs input from ourselves as well as from our Physicians. The body knows, and often tells us but is just as often ignored in favour of lifestyle choices. If we are present to the needs of our bodies, this remind the cells to switch on the mechanism of healing. Good health is not about alternative medicine, rather it is about complementary medicine which can work alongside the medical physicians to bring about the homeostasis required to maintain a state of wellness. The dominant model of medicine does not take into account social factors or individual differences and so also excludes prevention of disease as a role in healthcare. In fact it has been described in the literature as a relationship of compliance based on prescribing.

When you’re not working, what hobbies/past times do you enjoy?

I love to travel. I also enjoy sharing a meal with friends and eating out from time to time. I also have a large network of friends whom I keep in contact with. My friends are important to me and many of them live in Ireland. I have a friend Anne from my school days who also lives in Bolton with whom I meet up to discuss old and new interests. I enjoy being with like-minded people.I also travel to Ireland several times a year to catch up with my family. I have a son and daughter and three grandchildren who live in Southern Ireland. I did my Bio training in Ireland and I enjoy networking with my colleagues. I hope to help Tom with teaching ‘HiddenMind Bio’ in the UK later this year.

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Personal now – what outfits and shoes would you normally be found wearing?

I have a love of clothes but they need to suit how I like to look. I like outfits to flow rather than the eye having to stop and start – I suppose I would describe it as all seen in one photo rather than needing to fit many photos together to get the picture, if you know what I mean. If I am wearing a skirt or trousers the top / tunic needs to be longer than waist level.I also am a jacket person but again, I don’t like short jackets on myself. And I like to include a gilet as part of an outfit (everyday wear).I like to have a mixture of shoes which include a basic flat pair for colder weather, casualtrainer type pairs, dressy heels and sandals to wear with more dressy outfits.My main problem is trying to make a decision not to bring more than two pairs with me when travelling.

Do you have any favourite shops or online sites?

I prefer to shop in person and I like to look around several shops until an item ‘speaks’ to me.

Boots or Shoes?

I am a shoe person. I only wear boots when the weather dictates as I feel confined in boots and I always tend to notice nice shoes on people.

Links you would like to share e.g. website/facebook/twitter etc so that readers of the blog can learn more about you and your book.

I have a website ‘Nualatherapies.com’ and Tom’s website is ‘www.hiddenmind.ie’.
I am also listed on the Plexushealthcare.ie website (Bio-energy) as a Therapist.

Thanks so much for coming onto the blog today, Nuala.  It is such an interesting therapy and I hope my readers found it of interest too.  I must pick on your shoe thought though – it amused me to find that when travelling you find it hard to limit yourself to packing less than two pairs of shoes.  I have the same problem … BUT do you find after packing say 3 pairs of footwear, that you ended up just wearing only the one pair for the fortnight after all? Or is it just me?  Dear readers, what are your thoughts? I’d love to know!

Linda x

All photos have been published with kind permission of Dr Nuala Bent. 

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White Sorrow

This week’s guest has an amazing tale to tell – of one woman’s mistake, downfall, abuse and subsequent strength.  My guest is the lovely Andrea Aviet, author of the book “White Sorrow”  … her story about domestic violence, emotional and mental abuse, starvation and what amounts to modern day slavery …  Andrea has published her book and spoken out  in an effort to motivate women stuck in similar positions to get out and to get their lives back on track. I caught up with this brave lady recently to talk about her book and her life now…. Hi Andrea….

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Hi! I am Andrea Aviet, I am 34, a mum to two girls and have written a book called White Sorrow.

“White Sorrow” is a true story of 5 years abuse you endured at the hands of your 20 stone husband & his family. What inspired you to open up and write about your experience?

I felt I must have endured the nightmare for a reason and wanted to make something positive out of it – I thought if I could inspire others to understand that domestic abuse of any form is not right, and should not be endured, then I would have put my nightmare to good use.

It must have been quite an emotional rollercoaster to write about your experiences – from being estranged from your own kin, forced into sexual encounters, suffering from emotional & physical abuse. What was the hardest part, you feel, about recalling/writing your experiences?

Writing the bits about my children. When recalling those parts of the books, even from being pregnant the first time, it often reduced me to tears. Even now I can’t read out the parts about my children without cracking a little. I recently did a reading that was being recorded for a video, and I had to stop, regroup and start again  – I was so overtaken by emotion.

Your subsequent strength shown after managing to leave your abusive relationship behind is commendable – managing to take control of your own life and making sure your two daughters are having a life filled with hobbies, laughter & love. What advice would you be giving to your own daughters when they grow up and have relationships of their own?

Have your eyes open. Don’t get swept along by romantic notion. Always have some financial independence. And if at any point you aren’t being treated right, get out.

You travelled the world a lot as a child – including time spent in India. What country impressed you most? What place is number one on your travel bucket list?

I absolutely love Australia – it was where I wanted to go when I met Mark and married him instead of going. That is still on my bucket list. I also recently visited the North East of England on business. I am determined to take my children there for a family holiday now as the coast is so beautiful.

As a child what books did you enjoy reading? What genre of books do you enjoy reading now?

I loved reading as a child and still do. I would read anything. I then studied political science at university so my reading was around my studies. Now I read good books, with strong stories. And novels, but only when I get chance around working, promoting my book and being a single mum.

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Hypothethically speaking, if “White Sorrow” was made into a film, which actress would portray you?

I would love to play myself to be honest – not because I aspire to be an actress but because it is about me. I think a young, dark haired actress would be good….someone like Selena Gomez. She would be good because she would act well but she would also appeal to younger generations and they would heed the warnings the book talks about.

The charity Refuge is close to your heart and you have spent a lot of time fund raising. There are many ways to fund raise -what is the wackiest fundraiser idea you’ve come across? Have you any favourite fundraising ideas?

To be honest my fundraising will all be done through book sales. I read about people doing crazy things all the time, and whilst I admire them, that is just not me! I wouldn’t want to ski down a mountain in a bikini or jump out of a plane. I have survived my own challenge already and am happy just donating proceeds.

Is your book, “White Sorrow”, available to purchase worldwide?

Yes, online. It is available on Amazon and other platforms.

Personal now – what outfits and shoes would you normally be found wearing?

I usually wear smart casual. Maybe jeans or leggings but with nice tops and jackets. Things that go from day into night, but that I am comfortable in for travelling or playing with my children. I usually wear boots but sandals come out in the summer. I am only small so heels are good, but I can’t walk far in them!!

Do you have any favourite shops or online sites?

Not really. For so long I didn’t have a disposable income or even money for food, so fashion took a backseat. I wore hand me downs that didn’t fit. Previous to my marriage I wore a lot of designer clothing and good makes of shoes. I don’t think I have quite got the bug back yet, and am too busy promoting the book and looking after my kids to do much personal shopping!

What’s next on your clothes/shoe wish list?

I want to take my children on holiday, and the summer seems to be coming, so I will be investing in a sun wardrobe!

Boots or Shoes? 

Boots – I don’t drive so I walk a lot. Boots just protect your feet more, are more comfortable and practical yet can look stylish and trendy.

Links you would like to share e.g. website/facebook/twitter etc so that readers of the blog can learn more about “White Sorrow”

My website is www.whitesorrow.com and you can find me on facebook.com/whitesorrow1

Thank you so much for coming on the blog and telling us about your book and life.  Your book has a powerful message – whether male or female – domestic abuse of this nature is just unacceptable.  I wish you every success with your book, and all the best in life from now on.  

Linda x

All photos have been published with kind permission from Andrea Aviet.

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Interview, Life Issues/ Motivational Posts

An Interview With Life Purpose Tutor Sue Fletcher

Experiencing a midlife crisis? Feeling that life is passing you by? Want to find out what your purpose in life is?  My guest this week, Sue Fletcher, has a passion for life direction  and has been a life purpose tutor for over 23 years.  Combining traditional life coaching with the art of astrology, Sue’s programmes aim to help get life back on track.  Being fellow Geminis (Sue has a moon in Gemini) , we both share a common curiosity about everything and both enjoy talking… so let the interview commence …. Hi Sue…

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Hello, my name is Sue Fletcher and I have been married to John for almost fourteen years. It is a second marriage for us both and the week I met him back in 1997 I had two dreams on the Tuesday and the Wednesday of that week telling me I was going to meet someone special. I did my astrology chart and sure enough it indicated a major new love affair and one that would last! That was 19 years ago when I was 51. I will leave you to work out how old I am! I have two amazing children who live in Thailand and six grandchildren and another due this August. John has five children two live abroad one in France and one in Iceland. We get to travel to these countries and with my work I can now work online.

You are a professional life coach and astrologer. What was the inspiration behind your Life Purpose programmes, which combines traditional life coaching with the art of astrology?

There are quite a few coaches offering life purpose coaching as I researched it before I started putting the programme together. However there doesn’t seem to be an astrological life purpose coach. As an astrologer I can see what talents, gifts, skills and passion the client has and also what is at the heart and soul of the person. The client’s birth chart gives me a lot of information that other coaches cannot see. This is powerful and once the client has this revealed to them it gives them the confidence to go ahead and make changes in their life.

Find Your Passion card with beach background

How old were you when you started to get interested in astrology? Did you guess people’s star signs correctly just by observing their traits? (I’m Taurus/Gemini cusp, Aquarius moon, Libra rising, if you haven’t guessed already!) What’s your sign?

I can see from your photo the Libra rising as you have the look of Libra. I think you can tell that you have a certain amount of air in your birth chart too. Aquarius, Gemini and Libra are all air signs.I was in my early forties when I started learning astrology, although I had always had an interest in alternative ways of living and thinking and even in my twenties I was surrounded by healers and spiritual mediums. I was a bit scared of this kind of thing and now understanding my own astrology chart I realise it was part of my life path to be involved in alternative ways of helping and healing others. With regard to guessing what signs people are by observing their traits. Sometimes I am right and other times I pick up on their rising sign or a strongly placed planet they have in their birth chart. For instance your rising sign which is to do with your time of birth is all about how you project your personality & what you outwardly show to the world. Sometimes this is easy to pick up on; other times I pick up on another part of the chart like the Moon sign or a strong planet. My Sun sign is Taurus, Moon is in Gemini and I have Virgo as my rising sign. Both the Moon and rising sign are connected to Mercury the “Messenger of the Gods” so I love to communicate with everyone I meet. I am told I am a great networker! This is very Gemini so we both have the ability for communicating!!

Words Design your life written in the notepad.

You run the Life Purpose Revealed Programmes about four times a year – next one starts 6 September 2016 – what are the aims of the programme?

This programme is for anyone who is at a crossroads in their life and is not sure what direction to take  – someone who wants to make a difference and experience a more meaningful life. During the programme they will have the opportunity to find out about themselves on a deeper level and learn what needs to be in place to make them happy and fulfilled. As part of the programme they will receive a one to one astrology birth chart consultation which will highlight their strengths and talents and what makes them who they are. They will be coached to access and activate this part of them. The aim of the programme  is for them to understand themselves from their own perspective, which they learn throughout the program along with the understanding of their astrology birth chart which together becomes very powerful knowledge that is ongoing and that they can use for ever.

Have you got a target audience that you feel would benefit from life purpose coaching? 

Yes, my target audience are women who are experiencing their “Uranius opposition” which can be between the ages of 40 to 45 depending on the year and month of birth. Put in simplistic terms it is the time of the mid life crisis. It could be that they are not happy in their career, relationship or the children have just started school or gone to university. We experience astrological challenges throughout our lives and it maybe that someone aged about 58 who will be going through their “Saturn Return” may need to change their life too. Everyone experiences these changes throughout their life. We are given the opportunity at these times in our life to make any changes that are necessary. I am there to guide them through the process.

question and motivational phrases

The Life Purpose Revealed Programmes are run online – do you run other workshops or consultations, either life purpose or astrology based? How would somebody go about booking a coaching consultation with yourself?

I teach astrology classes from time to time and I have clients who come regularly for an astrological consultation. I also coach clients too. I will always look at their birth chart as it gives me so much information about the client. It is just how I work. Anyone can send me a message by email or on my contact page and my contact numbers are also available on both my websites.

Life Direction & astrology are your passions – but who has been an inspiration to you in your life? Have you got a favourite inspirational quote?

Oprah Winfrey, Wayne Dyer, Louise Hay & Marianne Williamson have all inspired me although Oprah has inspired me the most, mainly because she had such a rough start in life and has won through against all odds. I love what she stands for and identify with some of her life struggles. I loved her TV programme. I think if I met her we would never stop talking. Oprah has many quotes but I particularly love this one mainly due to the fact that it aligns with what my programme is all about:

“The whole point of being alive is to evolve into the complete person you were intended to be”.

sol y playa

When you are not coaching, what do you do to relax? Any hobbies?

I love to sing and I am a huge fan of the “Great American Song Book” big band and all those old songs from “Fly me to the Moon” to “Girl from Ipanema”.  I sang at both my children’s weddings and I belong to two choirs. I love musicals & theatre and go whenever I have the opportunity. I love interior design and renovating old bits of furniture. It’s the Taurus in me as Venus my ruler is connected to anything artistic.

Hypothetically speaking, if you were given the chance to visit/work in any location in the world, what destination would be number one on your list and why?

I love to travel and as I mentioned earlier I have travelled a lot and have been lucky to be able to work in Thailand, France & Spain. One place I haven’t been is Hawaii and I would love to visit and work there. I feel that Hawaii is a mystical place and apparently the call to visit there is stronger than any other single place in the world. It has a long indigenous spiritual history which offers lots of ancient wisdom. My astro cartography map for Hawaii suggests it would be a great place for meeting people who would have a positive influence on my life. So who knows I may even get the opportunity to travel there. I must put it on my wish list!

Personal now – what outfits and shoes would you normally be found wearing?

I love anything that is unusual & usually brightly coloured. I prefer trousers and tops to dresses as I think they suit me better. I’ve always loved shoes and boots that again, are different. I love animal prints too. I wear funky & unusual jewellery. I do like to match my shoes/boots to my clothes. I recently bought a knee length faux fur coat which is black and white like a snow leopard. I always like to be presentable and ready for any occasion. I always have my make up on.

Do you have any favourite shops or online sites?

The on-line shop I like is Joe Browns and I like TK Max as they do have individual designer labels.

What’s next on your clothes/shoe wish list?

I am looking for a top to go with some black & cream silk trousers that I have just bought. I do want some new summer clothes and maybe a maxi dress.

Boots or Shoes? 

I have been trying to find a stockist in the UK that sells “Alegra” shoes. It is an American brand and you can buy them on-line but mainly from Ebay or America. I would like to be able to try them on first as they cost around £100.

Links you would like to share e.g. website/face book/twitter etc so that readers of the blog can follow you and your words of wisdom.

My websites are:

www.lifepurposetutor.com

www.astrologysue.com

Blog: http://www.lifepurposetutor.com/blog/

On Facebook too – Life purpose tutor and
Astrologer Sue Fletcher

Thank you Sue for delightful presence on the blog this week and I love your fashion taste  – Joe Browns is one of my favourite online sites too 🙂  Astrology fascinates me as a topic (not a surprise really !) so dear readers, do let me know what star sign you are and what is your favourite personality trait connected with that sign? Are you a chatty Gemini, a neat & tidy Virgo, a majestic Leo, homebody Cancer? Do you think your fashion/footwear tastes are influenced in any way by your star sign? 

Linda x

All photos have been published with kind permission of Sue Fletcher.

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Books, Interview, Life Issues/ Motivational Posts, Music/Entertainment

An Interview With Lifestyle Entrepreneur Cato Hoeben

The term “Lifestyle Entrepreneur” was first coined in 2013 by ex American footballer, Lewis Howes, to describe an individual that creates a business with the purpose of altering their personal lifestyle and not for the sole purpose of making profits – focusing more on the rewards that enhance enjoyment and passion. To find out more, I caught up with the talented composer and lifestyle entrepreneur, Cato Hoeben, who has recently co written with his mother a book entitled The Lifestyle Entrepreneur… Hi Cato!

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Hi! My name is Cato Hoeben and I am a composer who writes music for film, adverts, games and documentaries and I have also released a number albums that you can find on my website.  In addition to composing, I also do voice over work and have a varied history of working in science journalism-related work as well as working as a web developer. I live in London, but spend a number of months in Seville where my wife is from. Over the last 4-5 years, I’ve become what’s known as a ‘lifestyle entrepreneur’ which, in a nutshell, is an approach to making a living that allows you to shape a lifestyle the way you want by earning through multiple revenue streams.

Apart from being a lifestyle entrepreneur, you are co-author of the book “The Lifestyle Entrepreneur” – a step by step guide for people of all ages looking in depth at what is actually entailed in becoming a lifestyle entrepreneur. Having worked in London at a media production company where you created online GCSE science modules, what made you give up your belief that the key to financial security & future happiness was stable employment?

When you look at the ‘single job’ approach objectively, it’s pretty illogical. While it’s true that there is a hierarchy in place in many organisations that you can wrestle your way through, today’s work environment is much more hostile and less stable than it was a few decades ago. Once you lose that line of income, you’re back in line to find a replacement, and usually you’ll need to do it fast if you have a mortgage, family and bills. So, in my opinion, there is no ‘job for life’. You can easily be dropped by your boss, replaced by someone (locally or even remotely now) or the company just goes bust and in fact I have seen this happen a couple of times in previous jobs. When that happens, you suddenly have no income which blows the ‘financial security’ argument out of the water. Obviously, if you’re happy in your job and have the free time to do all the things you want to do, then that’s fantastic. But I’ve come across many instances with friends, colleagues and other contacts saying they are tired of the often tense employer-employee relationship in their jobs, the lack of time for family, friends and the limited salaries they receive to believe that the antiquated work model we’re told we have to follow is the path to happiness. Being more entrepreneurial seems to me a much more exciting, empowering (although I hate that word) and potential lucrative way of bringing in an income and shaping how you live your life.

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What are the differences between being a lifestyle entrepreneur and being a freelancer?

Good question and one I’m asked a lot. One of the principle aims of being a lifestyle entrepreneur is that you build a ‘buffer’ for your earnings so that you don’t fall into the typical employer-employee model. As a freelancer, you work to commission i.e. you are employed to do a specific job for a client and then it’s usually over. I call that type of income ‘active earning’ as you dedicate time to actively doing the work on a contractual basis. In contrast, ‘passive earning’ would be the equivalent of setting up an investment of some kind and is often much slower to build up but can turn into a regular income stream. In my case, my albums and the royalties I get from licensing my music for film, adverts and other productions are ‘passive’ income streams. I put the work into creating the product and then it continues to earn me an income stream in the future. Freelance work is almost always purely an ‘active’ income stream as you will usually earn no more in the future from that work. It’s essential to have both of these types of income when becoming a lifestyle entrepreneur as it will allow you some important benefits like having income streams you can fall back and shape the day as you want. I discuss both of these approaches to earning in The Lifestyle Entrepreneur and how you can approach a healthy balance between the two.

What do you love most about being a lifestyle entrepreneur? Is there a downside?

It has to be the flexibility of how, when and where I work. Those three things hold so much value when I realise the extent to which I can move work around to fit my needs or simply free time up to work on the things that require intense periods of attention (like a feature film…or my wife!). Even though it’s totally possible to earn a lot of money working this way, for me, it’s much more important to build a lifestyle that makes you happy. Once you realise you’re covering your basic costs like a mortgage, bills and supporting your family, there’s not much more that I find I want in life. In terms of the downsides, getting going as a lifestyle entrepreneur can be difficult and frustrating like in any entrepreneurial endeavour. There are ups and downs based on how your income streams / businesses fare, but a lot of the downsides can be flipped on their head by looking at the negatives or lack of interest in what you’re offering as something you can improve upon. The Americans are great at this and use something like a drop in sales as an opportunity to analyse what is ‘going wrong’ with their business. It can lead to all sorts of things to try out like advertising to a different demographic, modifying your product or service or even realising you’re offering something that has no demand so you either need to create that demand or try something different. Do I get tired sometimes with the workload? Yes, absolutely. But the energy I get from doing things I’m passionate about helps enormously as the division between work and play is thoroughly blurred for me.

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Your book goes into depth about lifestyle entrepreneurism – but what is your main piece of advice to anybody who may be unhappy with their work/life balance at the moment? What should their first steps be?

As I’ve been in the same place, I know very well what it is like to feel trapped in a job you’re unhappy in and all the doubts that go through your mind as to whether you’ll be able to make ends meet if you give that job up. And it’s unrealistic to expect someone to drop everything at once if you’re dependant on that income. So, my approach to making the transition was a gradual one and is primarily what I recommend to those who are more risk-averse. I began experimenting with things I wanted to sell online and built up some income streams related to music (my passion) all while I worked as a web editor at a mental health charity. As these passive income streams grew, I started taking on the occasional freelance commission outside of my primary job to help bolster my income. Time is always an issue when you’re in a full-time job, but these mini ‘businesses’ can take as little as a few hours a week to maintain depending on what you choose to do. Once I knew I could pay my basic living costs, I decided to take the plunge on a more permanent basis which freed up my time to find new clients and develop my income streams further. And don’t be misled by the fact some income streams bring in small amounts, $80 a month from various streams can build up fast.

Is your book available to purchase outside the UK?

Absolutely. It’s available as a physical book in stores like Waterstones and online via Amazon as a physical book and an ebook. There’s a link on our website too.

Are you looking at writing other books in the future? What topics would you like to cover?

Yes, although I’m still exploring those ideas. Something I think would be useful would be looking in depth at how the Lifestyle Entrepreneur approach can be employed in specific industries as it can be daunting trying to figure out how to make money from multiple strands in certain sectors. Some initial topics I’m considering are science journalism and music as I have experience in those areas. But any area that is that competitive and difficult to work in would make good topics to investigate as if you can make a living in a tough niche, you should be able to do it in any industry.

What sort of book genre do you like reading? Favourite books or authors?

As the son of a journalist, I’m a poor example of a bookworm! As dry as it sounds, I tend to read more for ‘function’ than ‘fun’ as it feels like wasted time otherwise, so you’ll find lots of self-development and practical books on my shelf rather than Nietzsche and Goethe. Feel free to label me a philistine. That said, I am a fan of great stories and my childhood was full of Greek Legends, books like Moby Dick and Robin Hood. I particularly enjoyed A Portrait of Dorian Gray and science-fiction books like Brave New World. In all honesty though, I get much more out of film than I do books because of the interplay between music and picture.

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Apart from being a lifestyle entrepreneur and author, you are also a talented composer, composing music for films etc. Growing up, did you aspire to have a musical career or were your aspirations quite different?

Since the age of seven I’ve been playing piano, so I’ve always had an interest in music. But I was firmly en route to becoming a science journalist having studied chemistry and biology at A-level, biology at Sussex University and then doing a Masters in Science Communication at Imperial. However, as any composer will tell you, there are a lot of parallels between maths and music so in a funny way I guess all those years molecular biology calculations and breaking my brain over molar masses was actually feeding my inner musician!

When you’re not writing, web designing or composing what hobbies/past times do you enjoy?

I love travelling abroad, exploring new places to eat in and play basketball regularly. Both Seville and London are fantastic places for food, the former being considerably cheaper of course, but some of the most amazing places I’ve eaten in have been in Japan. I’m also interested in sampling unusual sounds that I can transform into virtual instruments for use in my music, so you’ll often find me recording things like pots and pans, bowing strange objects with a violin bow, etc.

Personal now – what outfits and shoes would you normally be found wearing?

I’m a fan of Aldo shoes which is a chain that can be found throughout London, but also Grenson’s do some great shoes that I’m always drooling over when I pass by their shop. In terms of fashion, if you ask my brother, I’m the anthesis of stylish and he accuses me of wearing Cornish pasty-style shoes, but I like to think that hidden underneath my inner science geek there is someone incredibly stylish who is ahead of his time. My outfits are usually smart casual.

Do you have any favourite shops or online sites ?

I spend quite a lot of time on the sites where I offer my services and products to gauge how I’m doing and seeing what other opportunities are out there, but in terms of keeping up with news, I tend to follow the BBC website, Guardian, Lifehacker and TechCrunch. I’m not much of a shopper, but I do have an unhealthy tendency to spend lots on virtual instruments to use in my music that often needs taming.

What’s next on your clothes/shoe wish list?

I want to replace my pseudo-leather jacket that is starting to peel and show me up in public. But that could take some time as I need to find something that has a cut I like and long enough arms (the bane of my life).

Boots or Shoes?

Shoes as I find them more comfortable and less cowboy-ish. That said, I’m starting to try the boot look since a friend of mine convinced me to get some leather boots from Valverde de Camino – a small village in the province of Huelva, Spain that is renowned for having some of the best leather products in Europe. Since I bought them, I’ve worn them twice, so the adjustment is taking its time.

Links you would like to share e.g. website/facebook/twitter etc so that readers of the blog can learn more about you and your book.

The site for The Lifestyle Entrepreneur is http://bit.ly/lifestyle-entrepreneur you can also buy the book and read more about it at http://www.lifestyle-entrepreneur.net. We also have a FaceBook page at https://www.facebook.com/lifestyleentrepreneurnet/ and our Twitter page to follow is https://twitter.com/TheLifestyleEnt. For music-related stuff and info about my composing work, visit http://www.catohoeben.com.

Music from my album Vulnerable Beauty, here’s a soundcloud link:
https://soundcloud.com/catohoeben/vulnerable-beauty-montage

Or there’s my new album Flaming Flamenco:
https://soundcloud.com/catohoeben/flaming-flamenco

Thank you Cato for enlightening me, and hopefully my readers too, as to what being a lifestyle entrepreneur is all about.  I also loved knowing about your music too – the idea of recording virtual instruments sounds fun to me!  Pots & pans make great drums, and I made a virtual guitar once using a shoebox and elastic bands…. Dear readers, have you any virtual musical instrument stories to tell? Does being a lifestyle entrepreneur appeal to you?  Like always, I love to know so don’t be shy, drop me a line….

Linda x

All photos have been published with kind permission of Cato Hoeben.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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