I’m so pleased to be part of the Toward The Light book tour celebrating the release of “Toward The Light: A Year In Paris” , a memoir by Deborah Svec-Carstens. Before I launch into my interview with Deborah, here’s a quick summary about her memoir (and memorable year in Paris!)..
BOOK SUMMARY
At twenty-two, Deborah Svec-Carstens leaves small-town Iowa for Paris, hoping a year abroad will bring adventure, independence, and a fresh start. But just as she begins to feel at home, a morning run ends in sexual assault.
Every instinct tells her to leave. Instead, she chooses to stay.
As the months pass, Deborah leans on an unexpected community of friends, wrestles with questions of faith, and finds purpose in caring for Lily, the young girl entrusted to her care. Slowly, she discovers that healing is not a destination, but a path taken one step at a time. Set against the cafés, parks, and neighborhoods of Paris, Toward the Light is a coming-of-age memoir of trauma, resilience, and the courage of simply staying.
THE INTERVIEW
A big warm welcome to the blog Deborah 👋
Thank you so much for inviting me! I’m Deborah Svec-Carstens, a writer, book coach, and spiritual director.
After nearly twenty years as a government attorney, I resigned and spent a month walking the Camino de Santiago in northern Spain with two friends. I then returned to graduate school and earned a Master of Theological Studies with a concentration in social justice and ethics from Iliff School of Theology in Denver, Colorado. My master’s thesis explored a model of spiritual care for female survivors of sexual violence, and that work helped inform my debut memoir, Toward the Light: A Year in Paris. After seminary, I trained as a spiritual director. In that role, I companion women who are survivors of trauma or navigating major life transitions, offering a safe, supportive space for spiritual exploration.
Writing Toward the Light with the steady support of a coach inspired me to become an Author Accelerator certified book coach in memoir. Now, I help women write their stories of transformation, spiritual growth, and resilience. I offer them the same compassionate presence, accountability, and encouragement I received, so that hard truths can find their way from the body onto the page.
My husband and I live in Central Iowa. I love hiking in the mountains and reading on the beach, so we travel often. I sing soprano with the Des Moines Choral Society, mentor young writers through WriteGirl, and am a self-proclaimed “professional auntie” to a dozen nieces and nephews.
“Toward the Light” is definitely a thought provoking and courageous memoir – what made you decide to write down your story?
I started writing ten years ago, but the book had been an idea for a long time before that. At first, I wrote for myself. I wondered whether there might be another layer of healing to uncover through the writing. Later, I began writing for my nieces and nephews. I wanted them to know what I’d experienced and, more importantly, that I’d moved forward. I am courageous and resilient—and they can be, too. By the time I’d completed the initial draft and started revisions, I’d developed a deep desire to share my story and open the door for other survivors to share theirs. I wanted to give survivors and their loved ones hope. I wanted readers to know that my darkest moment was not the end of my story—it was an invitation into community, connection, and faith.
Your book highlighted for me many things: how hard living and working in a totally different country can be, especially using a language that isn’t your mother tongue; how the need for a supportive network is vital; working as an au pair & managing family dynamics as well as the other various emotions and dilemmas faced; combined with moments of pure joy; dealing with unexpected trauma; learning to trust people again; exploring your spirituality.
I appreciate hearing what resonated with you. It’s wonderful to learn what readers are taking away from the book.
What helped you get through your toughest moments of loneliness when you first arrived in Paris?
I arrived in Paris knowing no one. This was before email, smartphones, or the internet, which made the isolation even harder. Two things helped me get through. First, my mom wrote to me every day. Her letters kept me connected to home. Second, I discovered the American Church in Paris within a couple of weeks of arriving. I found a community at the church—a place that felt familiar, because I’d grown up going to church every Sunday.
What do you think were the main differences between living in your hometown in USA and Paris?
I grew up in a small town in Iowa. The closest city was Des Moines, which had a population of about 200,000 in the early 1990s. I’d visited cities like New York and Chicago and traveled overseas with my college choir, but I’d never lived in a city.
Everything about Paris was different. I had to learn how to navigate the Métro and bus systems. Every outing in those first few weeks brought new navigational challenges. The constant noise of horns, sirens, and traffic took some getting used to. I’d grown up in a large house with a yard; now I lived in a small room on the top floor of a Paris apartment building. The family didn’t own a dryer or a microwave, so I learned to time my laundry so my clothes would be dry when I needed them, and to cook without the convenience of a microwave.
I like how you described life as an au pair in Paris – and dealing with family dynamics! Was being an au pair/nanny in Paris what you had imagined before leaving home?
I went into the experience knowing little more than that being an au pair required childcare and light housekeeping. I didn’t know that French children don’t attend school on Wednesdays, which meant I would spend the entire day caring for six-year-old Lily. I didn’t know that my room would be on the top floor of the apartment building where the family lived, with a shared bathroom.
One of the most challenging parts of the job was being part of the family and an outsider at the same time. Several scenes in Toward the Light describe the difficulties that dynamic created early on. My relationship with Lily and her parents changed over the course of the year, partly because of shifting family dynamics, but also because of the trauma I experienced two months after I arrived. When I left Paris, I took with me a love for Lily and a deep gratitude for her mother.
Were there any aspects of writing your book that surprised you, either by being harder or easier to relate than you expected?
Writing about the assault was the hardest part. I was fortunate to have the support of a coach and a writing group. At first, my writing group thought I was writing a book about being a nanny in Paris, with anecdotes about living with and working for a French family and caring for their six-year-old. For months, I kept the whole story from them and avoided writing about the assault. Naming what had happened—first to my writing coach, and eventually to my writing group—gave me the courage to write the chapter about the attack. My therapist and spiritual director also helped me process the experience as I wrote.
At times, the writing became emotionally overwhelming, and I had to take a break. I wrote other pieces that had nothing to do with France or trauma—like an essay about baking with my niece—or I didn’t write at all.
I loved your writing style and the honesty that shone through. Did you find writing your story about your year in Paris, including your traumatic experience, therapeutic?
The writing became part of the healing itself, not just a record of healing I’d already done. As I wrote, I developed a deep compassion for my twenty-two-year-old self and for her courage and resilience.
As the circle of people I’ve shared my story with has widened—including at a storytelling event before an audience of more than 1,200 people—talking about my experience has become easier. Getting the story out of my body and onto the page has given me some distance from it and helped me release the shame I carried for years
What advice would you give to other young women finding themselves in a similar position to you?
To any woman who has experienced sexual assault: You are not alone. It is not your fault. And you don’t have to go through it by yourself. I was fortunate to have support in the immediate aftermath. The woman I worked for urged me to reach out to a friend. That friend urged me to call a rape crisis line. The woman on the crisis line connected me with a counselor, who connected me with a doctor. My experience would have been very different—and much more difficult—without them.
In your memoir, you describe finding friendship after visiting the American Church in Paris … through singing in the choir. Do you still sing in a choir? Are you still in touch with those church friendships?
I’m no longer in touch with the friends I made at the American Church, but I still sing in a choir. Before Paris, I’d been a member of Nordic Choir at Luther College in Decorah, Iowa. We toured the US and Eastern Europe together and forged lifelong friendships. Singing in the choir at the American Church gave me a community of people working toward a common goal: making beautiful music.
When I returned from Paris, I kept singing. Each time I moved to a new city, I sought out a church choir or community chorus, knowing I’d find a group of kindred spirits—people who love music and want to share it with others. For the last twenty-seven years, I’ve sung soprano with the Des Moines Choral Society.
Is Toward The Light : A Year In Paris available worldwide?
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Toward-Light-Paris-Deborah-Svec-Carstens/dp/B0HCGM39NR/
Barnes & Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/toward-the-light-deborah-svec-carstens/1150945556?ean=9798995885313
Bookshop.org: https://bookshop.org/p/books/toward-the-light-a-year-in-paris-deborah-svec-carstens/1499e712ad63e4b6?ean=9798995885313&bkshp-astro=t
Books-A-Million: https://www.booksamillion.com/p/9798995885313
You can also add this to your GoodReads reading list
Personal now – what outfits and shoes would you normally be found wearing?
My wardrobe has become much more casual since I left my government job. I’ve traded my dress pants and jackets for casual shirts, sweaters, and comfy pants when I’m working from home. When I go out, I wear various colors and styles of jeans and tops.
Do you have any favourite shops or online sites?
My closet is full of pieces I’ve bought from cabi over the years. The styles are timeless, and the clothes are made to last.
What’s next on your clothes/shoe wish list?
It’s fall here in Iowa, and I’m always on the lookout for a cozy new sweater (or two) this time of year.
Boots or Shoes?
Shoes. I go for comfort, and I love getting outside to walk, so you’ll most often find me in running shoes.
Links you would like to share e.g. website/facebook etc.
Website: https://deborahsveccarstens.com
Substack: https://deborahsveccarstens.substack.com/
Facebook (Author Page): https://www.facebook.com/Deborah.SvecCarstens.Author
Facebook (Profile Page): https://www.facebook.com/deborah.sveccarstens
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/deborah.sveccarstens/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/deborah-sveccarstens/
BOOK TOUR DATES
Lovely chatting to you Deborah 😊
Linda x
All photographs have been published with the kind permission of Deborah Svec-Carstens .
My thanks to Deborah for the preview copy of Toward The Light: A Year In Paris.
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